i woke up hungry today at like 5:30
it's been real hard to see God in the world lately
not for the reasons you might assume; i think i just forgot how
divine anthropomorphism is an uncomfortable topic in the Abrahamic religions (xtianity less so, but still, the church has torn itself apart multiple times over questions of the christ's humanity so like), but many of the interfaces through which we engage divinity are deeply human: language, song, communal worship, law, art,
i'm basically a funny social ape, right? and i've got a funny social ape brain with a bunch of precompiled modules for navigating social reality and engaging with conspecifics. even if God is so transcendent that even applying the predicate "human" causes a catastrophic ontological type error, my brain is a human-interaction hammer looking for a nail.
i think i've fallen into the classic trap of trying to peel back the curtain of my own humanity to meet God in the field of raw, unmediated ground truth, lol. no wonder i've been spiritually starved.